I'm Tara West, certified transformative mediator & relationship coach.
SERVICES
MARITAL MEDIATION
As a mediator, my goal is to help couples have the best conversation they can have. I do this by supporting each of you as you make your own choices in the conversation. This support can help you to clarify and express your own perspective, while also hearing the needs and concerns of the other.
Mediation can help you have the hard conversations you need to have, whether you're working together to save your marriage, to amicably part ways, or to make that decision together.
RELATIONSHIP COACHING
As a relationship coach, my goal is to empower you to be the best partner you can be, and to make decisions you can feel good about. In conflicts with our partner, we’re often pulled in two directions - we have our own individual needs, but we also want to preserve the relationship. At the very least, we want to treat our partner in a way that will make us feel proud, rather than in a way we’re likely to regret.
Through coaching, you will receive one-on-one support as you make choices that are right for you. You will also learn skills that can deepen and strengthen all of your relationships.
SERVICES
MEDIATION
As a mediator, it’s my goal to help people in conflict have the best conversation they can have. I do this by supporting each of you as you make your own choices in the conversation. This support can help you to clarify and express your own perspective, while also hearing the needs and concerns of the other.
Mediation can help with any kind of conflict (e.g., between spouses who are trying to save their marriage, amicably part ways, or make that decision together; or between separated co-parents, a parent and adult child, adult siblings, and co-workers).
CONFLICT COACHING
As a conflict coach, my goal is to empower you to handle conflicts in a way you can feel good about. In conflicts, we’re often pulled in two directions - we have our own individual needs, but we also want to preserve the relationship. At the very least, we want to treat the other person in a way that will make us feel proud, rather than in a way we’re likely to regret.
Through coaching, you will receive one-on-one support as you make choices that are right for you. You will also learn skills that can deepen and strengthen all of your relationships.
MEDIATION TRAINING
We now offer customized consultation and training packages for workplaces and organizations. If you would like to discuss the possibilities, please get in touch!
You can also learn about our new half-day Transformative Mediation Essentials workshop by clicking below.
TRAINING
We now offer customized consultation and training packages for workplaces and organizations. If you would like to discuss the possibilities, please get in touch!
MEDIATION TRAINING
We are excited to announce the launch of Transformative Mediation Essentials, developed in collaboration with the Conflict Management Academy.
BEYOND ESTRANGEMENT
We are also excited to announce the launch of our new online course for parents of estranged children, Beyond Estrangement (with bonus live sessions, May-July 2024).
MEDIATION TRAINING
Transformative Mediation Essentials is our self-paced online course for mediators, developed in collaboration with the Conflict Management Academy.
DROP-IN GROUP SESSIONS
SHOULD I GET DIVORCED?
If you’ve been asking yourself this question for a while now, with no clear answer, you’re not alone. Many people struggle with this question for years before making a decision. Or they make one decision, regret it, and then make a different decision a month or two later - sometimes repeating this cycle over and over again throughout the course of their marriage.
In these small group sessions, Tara will lead you through guided meditations to help you gain clarity around this topic. You will leave with tools you can use to make a clear, conscious choice so your whole family can move forward, one way or the other.
POWERFUL LISTENING
When we think of listening, we rarely think of the word “powerful.” Yet, attentive, nonjudgmental listening is probably the most powerful tool we have to connect with others, to deepen our understanding, and to be fully heard ourselves.
In these small group sessions, Tara will begin by demonstrating this method of listening on a volunteer. Participants will then have the opportunity to practice with each other and experience what it is like to hear, and to be heard, in a powerful way. This workshop is suitable for lay persons and conflict professionals alike.
TRAINING
TRANSFORMATIVE MEDIATION CRASH COURSE
If you’ve been asking yourself this question for a while now, with no clear answer, you’re not alone. Many people struggle with this question for years before making a decision. Or they make one decision, regret it, and then make a different decision a month or two later - sometimes repeating this cycle over and over again throughout the course of their marriage.
In these small group sessions, Tara will lead you through guided meditations to help you gain clarity around this topic. You will leave with tools you can use to make a clear, conscious choice so your whole family can move forward, one way or the other.
FOR WORKPLACES AND ORGANIZATIONS
When we think of listening, we rarely think of the word “powerful.” Yet, attentive, nonjudgmental listening is probably the most powerful tool we have to connect with others, to deepen our understanding, and to be fully heard ourselves.
In these small group sessions, Tara will begin by demonstrating this method of listening on a volunteer. Participants will then have the opportunity to practice with each other and experience what it is like to hear, and to be heard, in a powerful way. This workshop is suitable for lay persons and conflict professionals alike.
DROP-IN GROUP SESSIONS
RELATIONSHIP REPAIR (PART 1): BUILDING CONNECTION
The two most important skills to master if you want to repair a relationship are emotion regulation and attentive, nonjudgmental listening. With these two skills, conflicts (or potential conflicts) can actually bring you closer together, rather than further apart.
In these small group sessions, Tara will demonstrate tools you can use to remain calm and centered in difficult situations and to listen in a way that makes others want to listen back. All participants will have the opportunity to ask questions and to practice with each other. You will leave with powerful tools you can use to deepen your connections with others and improve any relationship.
RELATIONSHIP REPAIR (PART 2): SETTING BOUNDARIES
One key to a healthy relationship is healthy boundaries, but establishing healthy boundaries is often more easily said than done. Setting boundaries that foster genuine, meaningful connection means finding the optimal level of permeability - not too open, not too closed, but “just right” for you. Of course, “just right” will vary from person to person, and from situation to situation.
In these small group sessions, you will learn how to identify and set your own “just right” boundaries, and you will leave empowered to meaningfully connect with others without losing yourself.
SHOULD I GET DIVORCED?
If you’ve been asking yourself this question for a while now, with no clear answer, you’re not alone. Many people struggle with this question for years before making a decision. Or they make one decision, regret it, and then make a different decision a month or two later - sometimes repeating this cycle over and over again throughout the course of their marriage.
In these small group sessions, Tara will lead you through guided meditations to help you gain clarity around this topic. You will leave with tools you can use to make a clear, conscious choice so your whole family can move forward, one way or the other.
THE AMICABLE DIVORCE
In these information-packed small group sessions, Tara will share exactly what you need to know to start your divorce along an amicable path. You will learn about the continuum of divorce process options, how to choose the process that’s right for you, and steps you can take to make your divorce as amicable as it can be, whichever process you choose.
Participants will have opportunities to ask questions throughout the session, and will leave with tools and resources to create a smooth and amicable transition for the whole family.
ABOUT TARA
MY APPROACH
With a background in both law and psychology, I have a long-standing interest in helping people resolve conflicts and rise to challenges. I've come to believe that people, at their best, want to get along with each other. We want to take care of ourselves without victimizing others. In fact, we often want to help each other - even strangers. But when we're in conflict, it's difficult to be our best. We often find ourselves attacking the other person, or giving in simply to end the conflict. Neither response feels right to us, and both tend to make the conflict worse - if not in the short run, then in the long run.
As a mediator and relationship coach, my goal is to empower you to be your best, and to make choices that are right for you. If you're in mediation, the mediator's support might be all you need to have a constructive conversation. If mediation is not the right option for you, or if additional support is needed, coaching can make all the difference. Through coaching, you will get clear on your own needs and priorities, and will learn the skills you need to handle any conflict effectively. Both mediation and coaching can help you make choices that honor yourself and the other person, serving you well in all of your relationships.
EDUCATION
- New York University School of Law, JD
- Stony Brook University, PhD
- Indiana University, BA
TRAINING
- Virtual Coach
- Institute for the Study of Conflict Transformation
- Transformative Mediation with Dan Simon
- Center for Understanding in Conflict
- Center for Mediation and Training
- Ackerman Institute for the Family
- Community Mediation Services, Inc.
- New York Peace Institute
ABOUT TARA
MY APPROACH
With a background in both law and psychology, I have a long-standing interest in helping people resolve conflicts and rise to challenges. I've come to believe that people, at their best, want to get along with each other. We want to take care of ourselves without victimizing others. In fact, we often want to help each other - even strangers. But when we're in conflict, it's difficult to be our best. We often find ourselves attacking the other person, or giving in simply to end the conflict. Neither response feels right to us, and both tend to make the conflict worse - if not in the short run, then in the long run.
As a mediator and conflict coach, my goal is to empower you to be your best, and to make choices that are right for you. If you're in mediation, the mediator's support might be all you need to have a constructive conversation. If mediation is not the right option for you, or if additional support is needed, conflict coaching can make all the difference. Through coaching, you will get clear on your own needs and priorities, and will learn the skills you need to handle any conflict effectively. Both mediation and coaching can help you make choices that honor yourself and the other person, serving you well in conflicts large and small.
EDUCATION
- New York University School of Law, JD
- Stony Brook University, PhD
- Indiana University, BA
TRAINING
- Virtual Coach
- Institute for the Study of Conflict Transformation
- Transformative Mediation with Dan Simon
- Center for Understanding in Conflict
- Center for Mediation and Training
- Ackerman Institute for the Family
- Community Mediation Services, Inc.
- New York Peace Institute
BOOKS
The Mediator's Approach
Five (and a Half) Paths Through Conflict
If you’re confused by the conflict resolution process known as mediation, and all its many meanings, look no further. In The Mediator’s Approach: Five (and a Half) Paths Through Conflict, winner of the 2022 Dorothy Della Noce Writing Prize, you will learn the theory, goals, and practices of five (and a half) of the main approaches practiced by mediators today.
Self-Determination in Mediation
The Art and Science of Mirrors and Lights
In this groundbreaking resource, Dan Simon and Tara West illustrate how self-determination can mean much more than the absence of coercion—it can mean the opportunity for participants to increase their sense of agency as they gain clarity and confidence to make their own decisions, including those that express their highest values.
TESTIMONIALS
"Tara's mediation has been invaluable for our family. Her presence helped us get through some very difficult conversations, smooth out miscommunications and even talk about things we'd been avoiding for YEARS. Thanks to her (and our own work/willingness to change) we have been able to move past roadblocks and are light-years ahead of where we were."
Lilian F
“Tara has a gift for helping others . . . She has a genuine concern for others and is willing to really get into the weeds like no one else I've met before. She has a great balance of logic and care. She's very supportive, but will also call you to task and challenge you. She will open your eyes and help you to find the answers and motivations you need to give you the clarity to move ahead. I am truly impressed."
Amy S
"Tara worked with me over the course of several sessions with conflict resolution strategies. We began after I had recently had a difficult conflict with a family member, as I knew that learning new conflict resolution tools would be helpful to navigate challenges in my life. Tara is an excellent listener and teacher, and helped me to think about, and approach, the conflicts I was experiencing in a new way, with more beneficial outcomes for all parties."
Dave W
"I recently had a session with Tara where she helped me navigate a conflict that was presenting in my life. Her approach was gentle and safe which I needed in order to explore the wisdom within me. I walked away with steps towards how to work through this conflict. Thank you Tara for your guidance!"
Kerri-Ann A
"I mean it sincerely when I say, I gleaned more insight during our short time together than with any therapist I have seen in the past."
Ann C
GET STARTED NOW!
Sign up to receive the free guide: "7 Steps to Saying No: How to reduce conflict and increase connection by saying no with confidence"
GET STARTED WITH A FREE GUIDE
What you will learn in this free guide:
- How to know when you're at risk of saying yes when your real answer is no (or no when your real answer is yes)
- How to access your inner wisdom and make the choice that's right for you
- How to communicate your choice in a way that you (and the other person) will feel good about!
GET STARTED WITH A FREE GUIDE
7 Steps to Saying No
How to reduce conflict and increase connection by saying no with confidence
Transforming Conflicts and Relationships
When conflict is handled well, it can bring you closer to those you care about rather than further apart. Find out how you can transform your conflicts - and your relationships - with a free consultation.
© 2023-2024 TARA WEST